Draft found from Feb 2022 :)

 Well well well, 

Here we are again. 

I honestly always surprise myself at how long it takes me to come back to this blog, but I am so grateful to my past self for doing this, because I’ve found that my past self almost always helps my present self. 

SO much has happened that I dont know if I can fit it all in a post, but I’ll try to tell you the highlights. 

Let’s see… the last time I wrote a post, I was about to go to a youth conference for the first time, and this time- I am writing on the plane coming home from my third (and probably last) conference. 

In terms of “finding someone special”, these conferences are disappointing. 

BUT in terms of making friends, it definitely is nice. 

I think I sometimes forget to look back at the good parts of my life experiences, so at times I have to force myself to do so, which ultimately reminds me of positive things that happened. For example: 

I spent time with one of my besties (G). 

I met a bunch of nice people honestly and heard some of their life stories. 

I went to Chicago- I love going places. 

I stood up for my faith in small ways. 

I felt pretty most of the time- didn’t love my outfit the last night0 but is that really important? Lol no- I did look SUPER cute the other nights lol 

I met a couple cute guys- nothing that seemed to stick, but it was nice to have an interaction nonetheless. 

Overall, it was a nice trip. :) 

I really want and need to work on being present though- sometimes I find myself in a fog as if I’m dreaming and it scares me- but when I say the Jesus Prayer. It helps. <3 

Let me try to give you an overview of the past two years- yikes lol 

2020- 

Started my internship0 was scary but cool 

Covid happened 

Was furloughed and stayed home for 4 months 

Went back for overnight shift but didnt feel safe, because of the looting of the malls

Took a leave of absence and started working as extra help at Tata’s office in July 2020

Got laid off from the hotel in September (fair enough) 

Had surgery in October because of a ruptured appendix and didn’t realize until after a while that I could have easily died- Thank God I was okay- 

That honestly taught me a lot, I think of it sometimes when I feel weak and I feel strengthened knowing that I got thorough it- I have a small dent on my nose from a tube after the surgery, and at first I was worried about it, but I’m glad I have it, because it reminds me to be courageous. 

Let’s see- 

I went to Montenegro with Tata and met my cousins and friends I still keep in contact with <3 (especially D)

That trip helped me gain more confidence in myself. 

Fast forward to my birthday weekend in March where Mihaila, Nina and I went to San Fran- it was so fun- we rented a red corvette haha and I cracked my tooth LOL which was fixed eventually. 

DUDE- pause. 

My life is so cool and fun. 

I should never complain lol 

Anyways- my 25th birthday party was also really fun- it was at Nina and mine apartment that we both loveeeeee (Oh yeah, we got a nice apartment in August and still have it)

Went to Mexico with the Popovici and fam in May and almost hung out with some hotties LOL key word almost. 

OH MY FRIEND AND I RECONCILED and we’re so close again- but I appreciate our time apart even though it was painful- being apart helped me to grow more into myself and while we lean on each other, I feel like my life is more my own than hers for sure compared to before. She supports me. 

My family is a mess but I truly love them- when my siblings were bothering me lol my dad said to me the other day something along the lines of- yes, you guys have arguments- but you guys would die for each other at the end of the day- thinking about that truly helps me to remember that our little arguments are a but silly- 

Hmm what’s next- 

Oh yeah. 

I stopped talking with a family friend that was a big advisor in my life and while I miss them much, I am also so proud of myself for finally believing that I could actually survive without them and their advice, and that’s pretty big. 

I find myself still searching for someone to lean on and to answer my questions, but I do have wonderful family and friends that help me- and I also need to build my relationship with Christ which I KNOW will help me gain peace and stability in my soul. 

ANYWAY- 

July 2021- Serbia and Montengro :) 

Flew there all by myself- I was so proud (of course God also kept me safe) that trip I really got out of my confort zone

Had my first hand hold lol 

Gave my injtagem to a konobar lol 

Went on a raft with 20 of my cousins friends and my cousin wasn’t there- which is big for me lol 

Etc 

Hmm 

Oh yeah- I became front desk supervisor at the office back in January 2021- and this past November 1st- 

I became office manager. 

Don’t ask me how it happened- idk either lol 

I had multiple reasons for why I wanted to be office manager: 

I wanted to help my family with our family business 

I wanted to prove to people that I was/am capable 

I wanted to prove to myself that I was/am capable

OH YEAH 

I also started a masters degree for international management in January 2021 dang flabbit and will hopefully be graduating in August if all goes well. 

I’m in stats now and I hate it lol but whatever happens, happens- it’s always worked out with God’s help, so it’ll be alright. 

Okayyyy 

Back to being manager- 

It’s hard dude. 

Ups and downs

I’m proud of myself though. 

It’ll be four months in a week and a half- and while I feel like there are so many things that I want to fix/update and learn, I should be proud of how far I’ve come- the biggest thing I have to work on is time management (surprise surprise)- I need to learn how to delegate, use my own time wisely, and also work on being kind, but firm. 

It’s a work in progress to say the least. 

OH YEAH HA

I went back to Serbia and Montenegro with Nina in January 2022- met up with one of my best friends Irina - which I met in July- God put her in my life I just know it- I feel like I’ve known her for years and I’m just myself around her <3 She rocks. 

I actually had a super cool convo when I hung out with that konobar from the past- because long story short my sister’s talking with his friend. 

I wonder what update I’ll have on that next time I write lol but they’re cute together (not official though)

Some friend updates: 

Salome had her second baby 

Aleks might have gotten a boyfriend this weekend lol

Mihaila will probably be engaged with Aco this year- they truly are good for each other 

Liks had a bf but she’s growing from the breakup 

While there are definitely some bad things happening in the world right now, 

All I can do is try my best, focus on today, trust in God- and keep moving forward. 

I told Nina my “New Years resolution” would be to have a healthier mind, soul and body and I stand by that- hopefully I will gain more confidence overall and also create a more stable foundation for my day, more structure and more of taking care of myself- don’t forget to take care of yourself- 

Honestly, I’ve been sad lately, but whenever I focus on others more, I feel relief and peace- I’;m gonna try to do that more. 

If I’m reading this next year- I hope that future Natasha is more joyful, closer to Christ, more confident and stronger as a person. 

There has been a LOT of growing pains the past two years, but a lot of growth too. 

Be kind to yourself. 

That’s what I want to do. 

By this time next year- I hope that I’m a lot more kind to myself. 

Remember, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. 

Don’t be discouraged- keep moving forward step by step, but remember that your’re doing pretty well- keep your head up. 

Love you, 

Tash